What Had She Been Thinking
by wvuchick21
Summary: AU.  "Twilight" never happened.  Kate and Gibbs had a relationship, only to have it crashed and burned.  Now, it's 3 years later and she's back in D.C.


What had she been thinking when she accepted his invitation to dinner? A nice, informal dinner between two old friends-and old work colleagues as well-which meant to her some area restaurant. Neutral territory.

Not Gibbs. She should've known-should've remembered, for God's sake-that with Gibbs, there was always an ulterior motive. He never played fair.

God, how could she have forgotten?

Was it really that long ago that he'd offered her a job at NCIS? Five years ago, this coming September. Three years, next week, since she walked away from Headquarters with her transfer papers to Pearl Harbor.

She was in Washington D.C. for-as unlikely as it sounded-Tony DiNozzo's wedding. She never once believed that he would settle down with one woman. But, she realized what Tony loved about his fiancée when they met her at the airport yesterday.

She thought she'd have that someday. Thought she did have it in her hands a few years ago. Then the bottom dropped out and everything slipped through her fingers like sand.

Miranda grounded Tony. Complimented him. And adored him. It had seemed that Tony had grown up in the three years that she'd been gone.

And, now here she was, sitting in Gibbs' dining room, watching him clear away the dinner dishes and wondering how the hell she ended up in this predicament. Oh, yeah, that's right; she accepted his offer for dinner.

Gibbs entered the kitchen, and then returned two minutes later with two plates of apple pie a la mode.

She eyed him suscpiously as he sat down across from her. She was waiting for the ulterior motive to show itself. He placed one of the plates in front of her. "What are you trying to do? Make me fat?" Kate grabbed her fork and forked up a bit of pie and vanilla ice cream. Heavenly and sinful. Unbeknownst to her, she moaned softly.

Gibbs bit his tongue and willed his body to not react to her moan. But it was no use. Three years away from Kate Todd didn't stop his body from wanting her. Hadn't stopped his heart either. If he had his way, by the end of the night, she would once again adorn his bed.

"You look good, Kate." He quickly forked up a bite, hoping to take his mind off of wanting to throw her down on the table and have her for dessert rather than some lousy pie.

"Just good, Gibbs?"

"No, not just good. You look beautiful." And she did. Another forkful passed his lips. "Hawaii agrees with you."

"You sound as if you don't want it to agree with me." Kate pushed away her half eaten pie, not longer hungry for dessert. "Why haven't you called me since I left? Why didn't you take up any of my offers to come visit? Everyone else as visited at least once. Except you!"

He sighed, "You were the one who walked away."

"And you were the one who pushed me away!" She jumped up from the table and stalked into the living room. She didn't want this. Didn't want the two of them flinging accusations at each other. She never should've come. Never should've accepted his damn invitation.

Why did he have to have dinner here? This house held too many memories for her. Memories of them together.

_Gibbs braced above her, slowly rocking his hips against hers, sending little shocks throughout her body. The whispers of love as he lifted her bottom up with one of his large hands, bringing her closer to him and then thrusting into her slow and steady, drawing out their lovemaking until neither could take it anymore._

Kate shivered as she remembered her strangled cry as Gibbs brought them both to an earth shattering orgasm right here in this very living room. That'd been the last time they made love.

A week later, she submitted her transfer papers to Director Shepard. Two weeks after that, she'd taken one last look at NCIS Headquarters before walking away from the one person that she'd never believed would've hurt her.

"I didn't ask you here to drudge up old memories."

"Then why did you ask me here tonight?" She heard him get up from the table and walk to her. Felt him standing behind her, keeping his distance. She yearned for him to wrap her in his strong embrace and chase away all the bad memories for awhile.

"I just…I just wanted to understand why you left so suddenly."

"I never thought I'd fall for you so quickly. And so hard. I thought you'd grow tired of me after awhile. Or maybe make an excuse about our age differences. So, I prepared myself for the inevitable. But it never came," she whispered as she wrapped her arms around her middle.

He heard the torment in her voice. Saw it in her body language.

"That scared me, knowing you love me that much."

"Had I ever shown you anything less than that?"

She shook her head. "No, you hadn't." The moment they started their relationship, Gibbs surprised her with all the attention he bestowed upon her. It had been he who said the three little words first. "But, that's not why I left."

"Why?"

"Don't you remember?"

"Jenny." It finally dawned on him.

"Yes, Director Shepard," she hissed.

Gibbs reached out and touched her. Made her turn around to face him. "She was and still isn't a threat to this relationship. Yes, we had an affair during a mission. That was it. Nothing more. That's where _Rule 12_ came into play."

"But I saw you two that day come out of the interrogation room. Saw the way you were looking at her."

He never knew she saw him and Jenny that day. He now knew how it must've looked to Kate; the two of them exiting an interrogation room that wasn't in use. "She asked me about you. Wanted to know what was going on between us. I told her it was none of her business." He framed her face with his hands.

A light flashed in her eyes. "Oh, God! I screwed everything up. Ruined what we had!"

"Hey, hey! You didn't do anything that any other woman would've done. I didn't explain my actions to you. Didn't pull you aside to let you know what was going to happen at work from now on. We were both at fault."

"Gibbs…" He silenced her words with his finger.

"No more apologizing or agonizing over this. It's done and over with. Time for us to move on from it."

"What if…" she whispered?

"What if what? What if this doesn't work this time around? I don't believe in what ifs. We're not the same people we were three years ago. We've grown," he whispered as he finally took her in fully. He had been right. Hawaii agreed with her. But so did D.C.

Kate ran her thumb over his lower lip. "There's a big problem called the United States and the Pacific Ocean between us."

"There is that."

"What are we going to do about it?"

He leaned forward, brushed his lips against hers and then lightly nipped her lower lip before retreating. "I would follow you if you want to stay in Hawaii. As long as I'm with you, nothing else matters. Hell, maybe I'll retire."

Kate laughed, "You retire? I don't believe that. Not one bit of it."

"Okay, maybe not retire." He smiled. "I wouldn't know what to do with myself it I'd retire." He leaned down again and kissed her hard, his tongue sweeping over her mouth, leaving her breathless when he pulled back. "I found the perfect thing to do if I'd retire."

"Gibbs," she sighed.

He clasped her hand in his and drew her upstairs with him, leaving the remaining dishes for later.

* * *

><p>Gibbs nipped at the underside of her jaw before moving down the smooth column of her neck. He felt Kate shift beneath him, trying to bring her body in closer contact with his own. He desperately wanted to rip his own clothes off and bury himself in her.<p>

"I knew I'd get you back in my bed." His teeth nipped at her collarbone, producing a squeal, then soothed the bite with a swipe of his tongue.

A breathy whisper fanned his forehead, "Jethro…" the rest of her words died on her tongue when his fingers slipped between her legs and into her heated depths. Her hands clutched his shoulders.

"Feel good, Katie?" He slowly thrust two fingers into her core while his thumb circled her clit.

She tried to form a word, but couldn't even form a single letter.

"Cat got your tongue?" His breath was a whisper against her breast.

He sounded so smug. She knew he had a smirk on his handsome face and she so much wanted to wipe it from his face. But he was doing delicious things with his fingers that were short circuiting her brain.

The weight of his body disappeared for what seemed like minutes, but were only mere seconds and in that short span of time, she whimpered. Whimpered, for Christ's sake!

She glanced up to see the tell tale smile on his face and she knew full well that he had heard it. And he was going to milk it for all it was worth.

Settling himself between her welcoming thighs-completely naked, now- had her moaning in contentment. He knew that sound. She was right were she belonged. She had finally turned her mind off and it only took him draping his naked form over hers.

He swept his fingers over the curls and dipped into her folds once more and circled her clit a few times.

She threw her arms over her head as a quiet moan exited her mouth as her orgasm washed over her. Her body quaked underneath his own.

He didn't think he could've hardened more until he heard that quiet moan, telling him she hadn't changed in the past three years. She'd always been quiet. And those quiet, little moans turned him on because he always tried to bring her out of that shell. Make her lose control

She never screamed. Her version of losing control was clawing up his shoulders and back.

"You won't disturb the neighbors," he murmured in her ear as he made a slow sojourn of her body. Gliding up her calves to her thighs, fanning her hips, skirting across her taut stomach to brush the undersides of her breasts.

He kissed her forehead, closed eyelids and then settled over her luscious mouth as he lifted up right leg to ride high on his waist as he slowly slipped into her depths in one smooth thrust.

"Jethro," she gasped as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled his mouth back to hers. Whispering against his lips, "I love you. Never stopped."

He fused his lips to hers again. Tongues stroking each other as he lifted her ass with one hand, bringing them closer and started thrusting harder into her, causing like gasps to fan his lips.

Her fingers raked through his short hair, scratching his scalp.

"Katie…baby." He sat back on his knees, never breaking their connection, pulled her up high on his lap and had her wrap her legs around his waist, which created a deeper penetration. He buried his face in her neck.

He slowly rocked against her, knowing she wasn't far behind. "I love you, Kate," he breathed into her neck. "Please, don't leave me again." Reaching between their joined bodies, he flicked her clit a few times.

She gasped. She licked and laved his collarbone as the maelstrom of sensations started coursing and when they burst wide opened, she gently bit down as her orgasm washed over her.

He felt her body quake in his arms and around his cock and he couldn't hold himself back any longer. He gripped her ass tightly, brought her closer and thrust four more times hard, before falling over the edge, bringing her along once more.

* * *

><p><em>Four Days Later<em>

"Hey, Todd, got any plans for the weekend?" Her partner, Hank Bentley, came up to her desk. "The wife and I are having a get together at our house tomorrow. Want to come?"

Kate tried to hide her smirk. Maybe Tony was right all those years ago about her male friends. "That's all right, Hank. I think I'll pass." She gathered up her belongings. "But you should know better than to plan something on the weekend. It never works out."

"Great! Now you just went and cursed me, Kate."

She laughed as she exited the NCIS Pearl office. She threw everything in the back of her Jeep Wrangler and hopped behind the wheel. Maybe she'd get herself outside tomorrow. Plan a hike up Diamondhead? Or head over to the North Shore? Anything to keep her mind off of what transpired during her visit to D.C.

Abby tried to reason with her when she took Kate to the airport the day after Tony's wedding. But, Kate needed space to work through what she needed to work through. Whatever the hell that was anyway.

She eased through the crowded streets of downtown Honolulu, on the way to her apartment.

She pulled into the underground parking lot. A few minutes later, she was riding up the elevator to the sixth floor and then walking through her front door.

She dropped her purse and backpack just inside the door and started undressing as she made her way to the bathroom.

Twenty minutes later, she emerged from the bathroom feeling refreshed. She came back out into the kitchen, dressed in a tank top and a pair of old boxers. She poured herself a glass of water and strolled into the living room and was about to sit down when a knock sounded on her door.

Kate set the glass down on the coffee table and went to open the door.

There on the other side, stood the one man that had occupied her thought for the last five years. "How did you get here?"

"By plane."

She noted the sarcasm. "No, I mean here…in the building. You have to be buzzed in."

"Oh, that," he waved it off. "I told the security guard that you were my fiancée and it was your birthday. And I wanted to surprise you."

"It's not my birthday. And you're not my fiancée." Kate raised her eyebrows at him.

"I'd like to rectify the latter part." He quirked his lips at her wide eyed stare. "I hope you've had sufficient time to think, because I've missed you like crazy. I want to be with you. I need to be with you. I'm sorry that I haven't visited you in Hawaii. Until now."

"Better late than never." There were tears shimmering in Kate's eyes as she pulled him into the apartment.

* * *

><p>"So, tell me about my replacement. I didn't get a real chance to speak with her at the wedding or reception." She held up her left hand to study the simple solitaire diamond in the fading sunlight that came into her bedroom windows.<p>

"Ziva is the complete opposite of you. But, she's grown into an impressive agent."

"Hmm, I'm sure she had an excellent teacher."

"She must've hated me the first couple weeks after you left. Everyone must've hated me. I wouldn't anyone sit at your desk. I found her there one night. I wanted to yell at her, scream at her. Anything. But she beat me to the punch. Told me that you were gone and that you wouldn't mind." He rested his head on her stomach and closed his eyes when she raked her fingers through his hair.

"And?"

"Oh, sorry." He popped his eyes open. "She'd found your sketch pad in the desk. Gave it to me. Looking through it made me miss you even more."

"She and Tony seem to get along."

Gibbs snorted, "Yeah. Those two idiots squabble more than you and he. Some days, they drive me to drink."

"Gibbs, you drink either way."

"That's true."

Kate laughed. "What am I going to do with you?"

"Marry me," his voice was muffled by him kissing her stomach.

"I did say yes," she gasped. "Gibbs, don't start something you can't finish."

He gently nipped the soft skin of her stomach. His hands molded her taut thighs. "I have no intention of stopping, Katie."

THE END


End file.
